During the mid-1950s, one of the most revolutionary studies in developmental psychology was conducted by Harry Harlow. He essentially gave young monkeys the choice of two surrogate mothers. One provided nourishment but no comfort, and the other provided comfort but no nourishment. This study essentially challenged the idea that infants bond with their mothers for bodily contact, warmth, and love/affection. Connection is essential to life.
In regards to humanity, physical touch hosts a myriad of benefits to our bodies: It calms cardiovascular stress, has been linked to a decreased risk of disease, improves mental health, and releases the "love hormone'" oxytocin. Over one of the longest studies of adult development conducted by Harvard University, strong and reliable relationships, not cholesterol levels, are the single greatest predictor of health and happiness.
Evidently, our relationships and connections are vital to our physical and mental well-being. COVID-19 has put a strain on this. With physical touch being exclusive to family (and some are isolating entirely alone), we are even more reliant on our relationships in an emotional context. Personally, it is difficult to take a deliberate effort to organize calls with my friends or text more than a couple of my friends. However, without school facilitating social interaction, this deliberate effort has made my interactions with my friends even more impactful and fulfilling. I wanted to share some of my favorite conversations recently to show how rewarding human connection can be.
1. Recently, a friend and I had a philosophical and utterly fascinating conversation. It actually began about this blog but eventually shifted to a conversation about our recent reads then moved to film recommendations to the hedonic treadmill to the shopping cart theory (an extremely interesting theory of morality which I can detail in a future post) to my strange answer to the question "what is your favorite food?" to our latest internal struggles. Despite the excess of Karate Kid references, I am incredibly grateful for the depth of that conversation and our friendship which sparked the idea for this blog post.
2. A close friend of mine and I met up for lunch in a park recently. She is one of those people that are always amazing to be around, and I was elated to be able to catch up with her after a while. We talked about everything from school reopening plans to our general disillusionment with being our teenage years to our relationships with our peers.
3. This conversation was actually a while back, but it was with some of my closest friends who were my roommates for a camp last summer. All of us practically became sisters, yet we hadn't talked in a while. So after reaching out, we were able to organize a time for a FaceTime call. We talked for hours basically recapping the past year of our lives to each other. Although we hadn't talked in forever, it felt like yesterday that we were sharing a room, and I am infinitely thankful to call them some of my closest friends.
This is a small glimpse into some of my favorite conversations to simply remind me of the value of human connection. I encourage you to reach out to someone, anyone (even me!), and talk to them because in a time that is taking a toll on our mental and physical health, our relationships are our support systems.
Janvi, as usual you have touched upon another subject of utmost importance, and given a concise description. While my thoughts are squarely focused on you, I am sharing my views.
ReplyDeleteHomo sapiens are considered to be social animals. Through the centuries, humans have lived in groups of people, rarely alone as individuals, and thrive with this feeling of togetherness. From the moment of birth every child recognizes mother's touch and her very presence itself. Physical as well as mental connections are equally important for their overall wellbeing and health.
With some people we make an instant connection, whilst with some others it just doesn't happen. In some cases, we may not meet or talk for long periods, but when we do it is as if we never separated. During prolonged lockdown restrictions owing to this ongoing pandemic, globally people are lonely to say the least, wherever they may be located, whether at home with family or by themselves elsewhere. Modern technology has provided the much needed bridge amongst the people through voice, text, video messages and connections over long distances; thus, as a matter of fact bringing them closer to what they have ever been in the recent past, perhaps due to having additional time at their disposal.
During these tough times, many people all over the world have lost their jobs and livelihood, and global economy has been hit badly. Even the rich and mighty people found themselves stuck at home with nothing much to do, eve though having all conceivable resources at their disposal. At such times, almost everyone has come to realize the value of saying "health is wealth" and also the importance of family, friends and others with whomsoever one could connect; it would be wrong to say people have tended to have become more humble (open question is: will it stay so or wither away once the current health crisis is over?).
Whichever way one view it, the foremost fact is that importance of human interaction and connection has now come to be accepted more than ever, especially during these trying times of the ongoing pandemic. Our love and affection for you is never ending and even though we would love to talk to you everyday, now and always, but we do not like to impinge on your time. However, mentally, spiritually, and psychologically, we always feel connected to you.
Wow, thank you so much for your comment! Despite the physical separation, I always feel connected with you both as well! Human beings from a biological standpoint are social creatures, and unfortunately, it has taken a global pandemic for society to realize the importance of physical connection. Often, technology can act as a dividing force, but now more than ever, it is being used to unite people during physical distancing. I think the balance between allowing technology to connect us without allowing it to detract from our existing relationships is tricky, and I am continuing to walk this line!
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DeleteWell said Janvi. Totally agreed
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